Hello my dear friends, it would seem that we come together today under very unfortunate circumstances. Today is Monday. This day should be a happy day, for it is this day that the ducks of the world rejoice, knowing that there is someone, one lone person, who cares about them. Yes, i know, i know. God i have to take a shit. It would seem that we here at The Shpitz will have to cancel  this weeks segement of Mallard Monday. Why you ask? I cant reveal all the details. So fuck off. Instead i bring to you our replacement candidate. It would seem that other birds of the world don’t like being segregated from ducks. They dont like ducks being better. personally i tell them to go burn in an oven. The board of directors disagrees with me and believes we should bring some diversity into the segment. If your confused about me telling you all this information after i clearly said i couldn’t, then you shouldn’t be here. The door is right over there. At the end of the hallway.

First door on the right you ass

Now that Jeff is gone i can reveal to you our winner! So since the board wanted diversity we bring you Jimmy!

Yes. Jimmy is special